5 Parenting Hacks For Dads Of Toddlers

There are times in my life as a dad that I just want to relax. I want to catch up on all the latest sporting news, contemplate the deep meaningful things in my life (like where does toe-jam come from), and let my mind drift away.

However, I don't want to neglect my kids, because then I'd be a terrible parent. My children would wind up in therapy 20 years down the road talking about how daddy never loved them, and I can't live with that on my conscience.

Luckily, I've stumbled upon 5 simple parenting hacks (or quick, inelegant solutions) especially for dads.

• Lay on the floor. This is by far the easiest possible thing to do. When you lay on the floor, it's like an instant kid magnet. The children quickly gravitate toward you and pile on. Not only do you give your kids that much needed physical contact and affection, but you get to lay on the floor, and there are few spots more comfortable.
• Go to the park and find a park bench. Children need their exercise, but after a hard day at work, or a long day as a stay at home parent, why should you have to facilitate the activities? Why not take the kids to the park, find a bench within eyesight of them, and relax? The worst case scenario is that you end up pushing a swing for a while.
• Read a book. Reading to your kids will help stimulate them mentally, while keeping your mind numb. Since your reading level should be far above that of a toddler (I hope), reading to your kids will require almost no cognition on your part.
• Teach them the rules. If you are watching the big game, have the kids snuggle in close and explain to them the rules of the game. Your wife or significant other is probably tired of hearing what a 6-4-3 double play is, so this is the perfect opportunity to find another audience.
• Ignore the kids. When all else fails, ignore them. I've heard it said that absence makes the heart grow fonder... this works for parenting too right?