off topic

I focus a lot on my kids at SimpleFather.com, and rightly so since this is after all, a parenting blog. But I'd like to step back, take a few minutes and say be aware.

I know that a new year often signals fresh starts, new beginnings, and wiping the slate clean. However, the fact of the matter is for many, a new year means just another year of heartache, financial troubles, and one year closer to the kids moving out.

So be aware of those around you. If your life couldn't be better, I guarantee there is someone around who needs a little help. Do something significant for them, other than telling them that it'll all be okay.

If your life blows right now, don't be afraid to ask for help. If those around you are truly your friends, they would be honored to help.

All the recent hubbub about Jon & Kate Plus 8 got me to thinking… what do they have that I don't? Why is everyone so interested in the Gosselin's, but when I go out for an afternoon at the beach with the kids, no one cares?

First, our family is 6 kids behind, and since my girls aren't twins, I figure that total is going to have to be closer to 10.5 before people start taking notice. Unfortunately, my wife thinks that it wouldn't be fun to be pregnant over 90% of her child bearing years, but I've got it all figured out. Since the first two came into this world via c-section, I figure next time I'll just request that the doctor put a zipper in after cutting my wife open. This will allow for easy child removal access, and cut the time between pregnancies as a result of quicker recovery time. I figure we should be able to pop out 8.5 kids in about 6 years… mission accomplished.

Next, I need a signature hair style. There's nothing the world likes more than a fashion forward reality TV star. I think I can make this happen with a little inspiration from late 80's Andre Agassi. With that much style, there's no way that I wouldn't stand out in a crowd.

Now I need a bodyguard. If nothing else, this will give off the perception that I'm so awesome, people want to hurt me. They're all jealous of my hot body, hairstyle, and 10.5 kids. But then my wife will be mad that I think I'm so awesome, I actually will need a bodyguard so I don't get smacked upside the head with her 3 inch high heeled shoes.

With these three things in place, the money will start rolling in, followed by the book deals and clothing line. I'll finally be able to hire nannies for my kids so I can get back to just being awesome, without having to deal with rugrats.

After only about a year and a half, twitter is no longer officially 'cool.' There were two distinct events which caused twitter to lose cool points. The first was when I started to hear every major news network begging for people to follow them on twitter. Second, people my father's age have started using the service, and everyone knows, if you're parents are into it… it's definitely not cool.

However, I will continue to use the service, because with greater exposure, twitter is now more useful. For example, companies now monitor twitter more aggressively, allowing a single tweet to be as powerful, and less frustrating, than a call to some help line in India. Also, twitter has become a branding tool of sorts. This day in age, everyone is their own brand, and what better way to increase brand recognition than to join a gigantic community and gain followers.